Will people ever learn to get along?

Lone fighters are out!
With the right team, ideas become reality faster

Tips on careers and professions

A contribution by Nikolaus B. Enkelmann

The hierarchies have become flatter, loners no longer have a chance today. Do you think Obama would have become so well known if he hadn't had a super team - professionals who wrote his speeches, who organized his election campaign, who maintained contact with the press. Without a strong team, nobody can make progress today, nobody can make a difference.

Michael Schumacher without his well-rehearsed team - unimaginable. What is true in sport also counts in the job. Those who want to do everything themselves fall by the wayside. With the right people in the right place, an idea, a vision can become reality. Do you have a good team behind you? How do you deal with your team? Do you succeed in harmonizing the different characters of your employees in such a way that a healthy tension arises in which positive competitive thinking makes creative solutions possible. Do you find the right tone, do you give positive impulses, do you motivate?

A constructive cooperation inspires creativity

Of course, when people are together, differences of opinion also arise. Constructive cooperation is not always easy in practice, because hardly anyone can choose their colleagues or bosses. Conflicts are inevitable where different characters meet and are forced to get along. Arguments and arguments are an expression of this situation. This often leads to stress, reduced motivation and creativity, a bad working atmosphere and reduced performance. On the other hand, innovative ideas cannot develop in an overly harmonious cooperation. Conflicts make sense for progress, provided you deal with them appropriately. Basically, you should assume that you cannot change people. If you become a master of communication, then you can influence people in the right way and they change by themselves. Each person can become a provocation to the other, each of us has what is known as an anti-type to he is “allergic”. Still, we all have to get along. This can be done better with the following tips:


  • Put yourself in your colleague's shoes

  • How do you perceive it, how do others perceive it and how does it want to be perceived?

  • Ask yourself what is he really trying to say and what is your interpretation of what he is saying?

  • Try not to attack, because attack creates resistance.

  • Formulate I-messages.

  • How are you perceived? Check that your image of yourself matches what others have of you. Ask colleagues with whom you get on well.

  • Analyze why you dislike some colleagues. If you change your behavior, the other will change too.

  • Maintain your contacts in the team. That strengthens your position.


Speaking of contacts: And what about your contacts? Have you built a network? It used to be the exclusive men's clubs, to which only the crème de la creme had access and where the really important decisions were made. Today it doesn't work much differently, only that there are many more opportunities to maintain contacts and support one another. How often do personal relationships make the difference. Profile yourself in interest groups, professional associations, clubs and associations. Make a name for yourself, maintain contacts. Give and take is the motto. Social competence is required here: the ability to deal properly with other people, to respond to your wishes and needs. Everyone is receptive to attention. Put the other person first and you will make a new friend. Listen carefully, be courteous and helpful. What you give comes back - not always immediately. In the long run, however, it always pays to do something for others.

The ability to communicate is the magic word not only for the networks. Are you sociable at all? Do you get to know people easily? Can you reach out to others? Do you have a good memory for people and names? Are you a professional in small talk? Will you be remembered? Just do a quick check:


  • How many associations etc. are you in?

  • How many people have you met in the last month?

  • How often has you initiated the initiative to intensify a fleeting contact?

  • Do you tend to wait for someone to speak to you or do you take the first step more often?

  • Is that difficult for you or do you usually have a start to the conversation ready?

  • Are contacts even important to you?

  • Do you consider yourself sociable?

  • Have your personal relationships already been of use to you in business?


The principle of give and take

This is perhaps the right moment to ask yourself the question “Am I a good friend at all?” Aristotle said we should bring ourselves into a form that allows us to form friendships. This includes respect, mutual benevolence and reliability. Because like everything in life, friendship is based on the principle of give and take. Just like teamwork. The personal relationship, the emotional level, is often much more important than the facts. We see that in politics.
Good personal relationships between statesmen often lead to more than long negotiations.



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About the author:


Nikolaus B. Enkelmann is an important successful trainer in German-speaking countries.
Together with his daughter Claudia, he heads the Institute for Personality Development, Rhetoric and Shaping the Future in Königstein / Taunus (Tel .: 06174/3980, Fax: 06174/24379). Corporations, large companies and medium-sized companies that plan ahead are particularly keen to engage Nikolaus B. Enkelmann for motivational and advanced training seminars. Over 1,000,000 people, top managers, top athletes, doctors and members of other professional groups attended his seminars. Nikolaus B. Enkelmann has also made an excellent name for himself as the author of numerous successful books, publisher of his own magazine and an abundance of audio cassettes and videos.

Further information is available from the Enkelmann Institute, Altkönigstr. 38 c, 61462 Königstein / Taunus, Tel .: 06174/3980, Fax: 06174/24379, https://enkelmann.de/, Email: [email protected]


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