Why don't people admit their selfishness?
Egocentricity: How you deal with it
It is completely normal for everyone to see things from their own perspective first of all. However, it is just as important to change your point of view in certain situations, to try to take other people's positions. In both work and private life, we repeatedly meet completely different people with different character traits. Some are easy to get along with, others less so. Egocentricity is one of the personality traits that is noticeable rather unpleasant, as it signals little ability to work in a team. How do you recognize egocentrics and how you deal with egocentric behavior ...
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Egocentricity Definition: The focus is on the self
Egocentricity is derived from Latin ego = I and center = Focus and denotes in the literal sense a character trait in which the respective person is in Center of all action sees.
Someone who is self-centered can also be referred to synonymously as:
Typical of egocentricity is that this person cannot put himself in the shoes of other people and everything out of their own own perspective sees. This means that their point of view and their opinion is the only true one.
The perception is thus greatly reduced, the egocentric cannot adopt other perspectives. That can to the point of denial of reality walk. From the point of view of egocentricity everything is related to oneself personally - all things that happen or are said in the egocentric's environment have to do with him in his interpretation.
Even if it was not intended that way by other people - the egocentric believes that.
Egocentricity is a form of perception that other sensations are ignoredbecause they are perceived as not belonging to themselves.
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Difference between egocentric - egoistic: The intention
Closely related (but not synonymous) with egocentrism is egoism, which is also called Self love referred to as.
The egoist does not have a particularly good reputation either. He is above all for your own benefit out. But there are different forms of egoism, which is why egoism is also valued differently:
We speak of healthy egoism when someone achieves his goals and ideas without harming others. Human togetherness only works if there is also willingness to help and altruism, because not everyone is equally strong and, conversely, everyone will probably find themselves in the situation that they need help.
However, that does not mean that one's own wishes and interests should be lost sight of. Exactly the danger exists when someone simply helps others out of sheer sense of duty. This is typically the case at work, when people cannot say no to themselves and still let their colleagues do work on them even though you are barely making any headway.
The basic idea behind healthy egoism is a survival strategy: It is assumed that, like in the animal kingdom, everyone was next to himself when it came to finding enough water and food.
The word is decisive here enough - Everything that is gathered beyond one's own needs no longer has anything to do with the instinct for survival, but is generally assessed as negative. There is talk of selfishness and selfishness.
Egoism in the negative sense means pursuing your own goals and interests without considering other people. Scruples and remorse are alien to such egoists, they are concerned with their own benefit.
The consequences of this for others do not matter for egoists, because consideration would mean having to take back yourself and that is out of the question.
Here is the one too Difference between egocentricity and selfishness: Both character traits draw a person who exclusively busy with yourself is, however, in the case of egocentricity it is more a product of certain circumstances, while in the worst case the egoist is perceived as mean.
An egoist makes a conscious decision for certain actions, the egocentric is not. On the contrary, he often does not even notice that he is behaving self-centeredly.
The relationship between altruism and egoism is difficult - some even claim that altruism is just disguised egoism, because altruistic people derive some benefit from it apparent selflessness - even if it is just the feeling of moral superiority.
In some ways, too much can be accommodating Even promote egocentricity: Those who are already circling themselves in their thinking will certainly not come up with the idea of changing anything when others are circling around them.
Egocentricity Psychology: Typical of Children
If you look at people in their development, then egocentricity is up to you certain age completely normal. The Swiss developmental psychologist Jean Piaget spoke of the “egocentrism of perception” in children. Up to the age of seven, this characterizes the cognitive abilities of children.
At this stage of development, you simply lack the ability to put yourself in other people's shoes and so your own point of view automatically adopts a preferred point of view. At some point this inability usually grows together and the child also learns things People and mindsets to include in his actions that would have been left out before.
Depending on how pronounced the egocentrism is in adults, it can be pathological. Psychologists then see them as part of the narcissistic personality disorder.
The reasons for such a manifestation often lie in childhood: Those who were hardly noticed by their parents as a child and who were not supported in their needs seem to compensate for this in later life.
Likewise, it is possible that egocentrism emerges as a result of one Childhood overprotection developed. The child had no way of developing healthy self-esteem. Narcissists never learned to be lovable as a person in their own right.
The feeling of deficit also characterizes self-centered people: The low self-esteem must be compensated by praising and Recognition from others seek, constantly draw attention to their performance.
It becomes difficult when the performance of colleagues is devalued just to emphasize one's own abilities.
It must be egocentric not automatically unsympathetic Be: Many an egocentric has positive traits and directs his need for attention in professional paths from which others also benefit: Such people are often "rampant pigs", they are then active as entertainers, actors and artists.
How well someone gets along with their egocentricity is one thing Question of self-reflection. If there is no success and thus the desired recognition, this can lead to a crash with alcohol and drugs, especially with such personalities. Here therapy can help to learn self-esteem.
Self-centeredness on the rise?
The American psychologist John Cacioppo researches loneliness and found in his studies that between 30 and 40 percent of the population feel lonely. For his study, which was carried out from 2002 to 2013, he interviewed 230 participants between the ages of 50 and 68 every year.
Therefore egocentricity increased over time. Conversely, egocentricity was also an indication of loneliness. The feeling of loneliness correlates to the psyche like pain to the body: It signals that the person has to take care of himself and his social contacts.
If these are not present or only to a small extent, this leads to the fact that one takes care of oneself - to the point of egocentricity. In view of the fact that not only in the USA, but also in Germany the Number of single households constantly increasing.
In 2014 it was almost 40 percent, so one could conclude that our society as a whole is becoming more and more self-centered. On the other hand, having a single household doesn't necessarily mean that the person feels lonely. Many singles love their independence and vice versa, a partnership still means no exchange for a long time.
According to Cacioppo, there is loneliness Completely harmless in the short termas it can help you to be clear about your own needs. In the long term, however, loneliness endangers a person's health both physically and mentally.
Self-centered narcissistic behavior in the workplace
A colleague who is characterized by egocentricity always relates all processes and actions of others to himself. He constantly compares with others and comes to the conclusion that only his course of action is the correct one.
There are many similarities to the narcissist here. In Greek mythology, Narcissus fell in love with his mirror image and so in modern working life, too, someone with an egocentric, narcissistic work style regards all work as symbolic Representation of oneself.
In doing so, he compensates for the lack of recognition and attention from parents. In his own mind he is omnipotent. That is exactly what he has to get confirmed from other people all the time. His colleagues are instrumentalized and serve him primarily as uncritical yes-sayers.
Real, friendly ties therefore have no meaning for someone like that. Since his way of working is the only correct one, he tends to devalue the approach of others. This in turn makes it more difficult to delegate tasks, because then, according to this reading, they would automatically be badly done.
He is also absolutely unable to accept criticism and reacts overly sensitive to aggressive.
Dealing with egocentricity in colleagues
How can you work with someone who sees himself - consciously or unconsciously - as the measure of all things? First of all, your own knowledge of human nature makes it easier to deal with challenging colleagues. It sharpens the senses and empathy, and both help to react appropriately to the situation.
Sometimes someone may just have a bad day. Anyone who keeps something like that in the back of their mind and can sometimes "leave it alone" is wearing it crucial to conflict resolution at. The assessment of a certain character is useful for linguistically engaging with the person and avoiding ambiguous formulations, for example.
Of course, constant self-adulation becomes exhausting in the long run, especially if you have not just one but several such colleagues. Then it is often about competition and self-profiling.
You can counter this by calmly speaking to your colleagues once open to his work praise. The other way around: Those who can admit their own weaknesses and mistakes - and this is where managers are particularly in demand - also take the pressure to perfectionism among some employees.
Ideally, different ones are alike Strengths and weaknesses of a team anyway.
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