Do you want to change your past?
Can you change the past?
No of course not. BUT what we can change is how it affects us in the present.
This does not even take place on the level of memory, but in our emotional world. That is, when our feelings about what happened in the past change, our view of it changes too.
An example: a client (over 50 years old) told me tearfully that her mother said to her at the age of 6: "I wish you had never been born". A few months later, her mother passed away, leaving the girl unable to find out why her mother was telling her that. The client suffered from this statement for 44 years, her whole life had been built around this sentence (for her this sentence meant: "you are not worth living, you are a no-good"). No matter what the client started, it went wrong (in the sense of a self-fulfilling prophecy, "I'm good for nothing"). During the consultation, my client succeeded in getting into a relaxed state, again mentally in this situation, facing her mother and asking her how she would have meant this sentence. To the surprise of my client, the mother replied: "I already knew that I had cancer and was very worried about what would become of you". It fell like scales from my client's eyes that the mother's statement did not express rejection but deepest concern. In this way, after 44 years, the client was able to make peace with her mother and revise her negative opinion about herself.
This client was actually "lucky" to be able to consciously remember this sentence from her mother. Many people don't live their lives the way they want, but don't know why.
There are methods in psychology to help the memory, or the subconscious, get on the jumps again. You don't have to remain a prisoner of your past, even traumatic experiences and fates don't have to keep a person from fulfilling and meaningful life for the rest of his life.
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