An unhappy marriage can lead to depression
Mentally Ill From Love? 10 Signs That Your Relationship Is Depressing You
If the relationship makes us sad more often than happy, caution is called for. Because the power of love can also change - and plunge us into a depression faster than expected. These 10 signs suggest that your relationship is making you depressed.
Relationships are a double-edged sword. You can let us fly on cloud nine and make us overjoyed. But on the other hand they exercise an enormous power on our emotional world, which also likes to turn around. In such a case, our relationship can also mean the opposite of happiness - it can make us depressed.
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Is Your Relationship Making You Depressed?
Depression is not to be trifled with. It sneaks up in the form of an uncomfortable feeling that turns into powerlessness and sadness. It covers our lives like a dark veil and makes it anything but easy for us to see clearly again. In some cases, our relationship is the trigger. If the part of our life that is supposed to bring us joy suddenly makes us sad, we should be careful. These are the signs that you can tell that your relationship is creeping into depression:
1. Your partner puts you down.
Criticism is allowed. Criticism is good. But only if it serves to make each other better people. In a relationship, we can point out our partner's mistakes - but also let them know that we love them with all their flaws. Love should build us up, not bring us down. If you doubt yourself because your partner is putting you down, the alarm bells should be ringing.
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2. You are never right.
Have you stopped engaging in discussions because your arguments are not being heard anyway? In a relationship, you treat each other with respect. And respect also includes admitting to yourself when you are wrong. Your partner should take you and your point of view seriously.
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3. You feel controlled.
Your partner wants to know where you are around the clock and checks your cell phone? Here love reaches its limits. Even if you like to talk nicely about such behavior and justify it with romantic jealousy, morbid control destroys the relationship. You are an independent person and you can do what you want.
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4. You don't make any more decisions.
Girls' evening and his friend's birthday party fall on one day - now compromises are needed. However, the decision will be made for you and your partner will determine in advance what you will do? Beware, you underestimate yourself and your worth. Your desires shouldn't get lost in a relationship. Sometimes it happens gradually that more and more decisions are made for us, without us actively noticing it.
5. Your partner is irritable all the time.
No matter what you say is it wrong? You don't have to put up with everything. In love we do a lot to ensure that our partner is happy. If this is not the case, we not only feel attacked, we are convinced that the fault is ours. Everyone needs a sense of achievement and confirmation in life. If our partner is consistently making us feel like we are doing something wrong, the risk of depression is high.
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6. Your partner dominates the relationship.
Either it goes his way - or not at all. This attitude is not only highly selfish and damaging to relationships, it also influences our self-esteem. We put our needs in the background - and no longer take ourselves seriously as an independent person.
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7. You subconsciously carry out his orders.
Do you do the shopping, do the laundry and bring his favorite food to bed? Are you really doing all of this out of your own intention? When our partner starts manipulating us or even giving orders, it has nothing to do with love anymore. Just because we're in love doesn't mean we have to do everything for the other. Our love should never be taken advantage of.
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8. Your relationship is one-sided.
Of course, it can also be nice to surprise and pamper your loved one with your favorite food - as long as these actions are not one-sided. As the saying goes: A relationship is a constant give and take. Giving should never be forgotten. If nothing comes back, we wither inside - and slide into depression faster than we think.
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9. Your partner is abusing you.
There is a form of abuse that has nothing to do with physical violence and instead takes place in the psyche. As I said, a relationship has extraordinary power over us. When we love someone, we become dependent (consciously or subconsciously) in a certain way. We are vulnerable and offer a perfect target for attack. Our partner should never take advantage of this power. If a relationship changes our self-image in a negative way, caution is called for. We must not define ourselves by how our partner treats us.
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10. Your partner is depressed.
Finally, it can of course also be the case that the partner does not actively do anything that makes us depressed. If your partner has depression himself, he or she will need professional help. You can't take this burden off him. Your strong connection increases the risk that you will ultimately become depressed yourself and let yourself be dragged down by its problems.
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