How do I control fear while speaking
Anxiety patients report their problems
Here anxiety patients report on their problems and experiences.
I'm always scared
My name is Alexander, I am 25 years old and have been scared all my life. The first time I can clearly remember was when I was 5 years old. I should bring my bike in for repairs. I stood across the street and watched the owner of the shop for a full two hours and tried to persuade me to hand over my bike. I didn't make it. I watched him close the deal and call it a day. At home I just said he hadn't been there.
++ More on the topic: The difference between "healthy" and "pathological" fear ++
That's how it started and since then I've had a never-ending fear that I can no longer control. I'm afraid to talk to people, to look at them. When I go or stay somewhere, I have the feeling that everyone is watching and judging me. It is as if they are piercing me with their eyes. I'm even afraid of children who just look at me or speak to me. I'm 25 now and I haven't even had a girlfriend yet. I've never kissed before, so I'm more virgin than the Pope.
++ More on the topic: Social Phobia - Causes, Symptoms & Treatment ++
Sometimes I long for someone with whom I can share everything. However, these feelings are short-lived, then the fear kicks in again and I knock this thought out of my head again. I've developed a real dislike for people over the years.
I am an anxiety patient
But since I've talked about it openly, I've been feeling even worse and I have attacks (palpitations, dizziness, etc.) almost every day.
++ More on the topic: Tips for panic attacks ++
As for my problem: if someone looks at me, my heart racing and dizziness immediately develop. Before I talked about it, I only had it with certain people. Now the cashier in the supermarket is not even allowed to look at me, my head turns red.
Then I think to myself, everyone sees that and laughs at me. Then I really want to get out, but I can't because I have to queue at the cash register. I also get a racing heart and get totally nervous until I'm finally out. Then I'll be doing reasonably well again.
I recently turned 24 and I'm slowly going crazy! I think to myself how I can and may not go on living as I do now! I no longer dare to go to a supermarket or, if so, I go in with the expectation that "it" will happen again.
When I tell my parents about it, they tell me it's actually normal. I'm just a person who likes to rock everything up. Maybe I have stress at work sometimes, but I had it a few months ago and I didn't have these problems then.
I am very afraid to go to the psychiatrist!
++ Advice centers for psychological, psychosocial & social issues in Austria ++
++ Self-help groups for anxiety disorders & phobias in Austria ++
++ Doctors for psychotherapeutic medicine in Austria ++
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